[it's gay but also mark is literally the only person who likes him rn and maybe vanadi but that guy is unreliable i rest my case]

They didn't give me a job description, like, all outright or anything? But I had to look at the body, which makes me either the coroner or a forensic pathologist. Not a cop or a detective, who'd have the ability to search the crime scene.

So, all I get to officially blink my peepers at? Is the corpse.

[He sighs, more frustrated than disgusted. Rex has seen a lot of dead bodies at this point, but a missing shlong? That's just rude!!! And terrifying. On a side note, if the guy was pathetically, um, "disappointing" in that regard at least the government will never know.]

The thing is, it's not like the whole team is all of us, so the only reliable members of the investigation are other peeps with numbers.

Aaaand that makes things so much harder than they need to be.

[At the mention of a good end-]

Also, what the flyin' fuck is this happy ending crap? This isn't a massage parlor in the backend of some shady alley! Ugh.